It can be difficult to outright ask whether or not a man is interested in a long-term relationship and many people fear that doing so will scare away a person who has potential, but may fear commitment. In many cases there are signs that indicate his intentions and what kind of commitment you can expect he will be able to make, but often these key actions are not evaluated until long after they have occurred. Making assumptions can be dangerous in a relationship, but a little common sense can usually allow for certain conclusions to be drawn. As with most human behavior, many of the situations people find themselves in are not unique and can therefore be calculated according to the typical outcome of such situations. By simply paying attention to some of the more common actions men take a great deal of confusion and doubt can be prevented.
- Beginning Contact: Often at the beginning of a relationship men feel compelled to keep a little distance from their partner by not making contact regularly. In some cases people assume that because of this lack of contact, there is a lack of interest, but this is not always the case. Our society dictates much of our social interaction (whether or not it makes sense,) and according to those unspoken rules men are not allowed to show too much interest.
Especially amongst men there is also a great deal of difficulty when he shows too much interest in romance; many men have friends who will tease them and make it difficult to make public their feelings for another person. Woman almost always have the support of their friends in romantic situations which allows them to feel confidant and happy about expressing their emotions; men often do have this luxury and for this reason might not express their true feelings right away.
Even people who are expressly looking for relationships (e.g. online dating, matchmaking or singles events,) can be compelled to act in accordance with what they believe is expected. Don’t be discouraged if a man does not initiate contact as often as you would like toward the beginning of a relationship; though if he is constantly aloof or breaks dates this can be a very bad sign indeed.
Chance of Long-term Relationship with little contact: 50%
- Sharing the Little Things: After the initial stages of a relationship have moved into a slightly more comfortable phase many men who are interested in the long-term will desire conversations about the daily goings on of your life. If they do not express this interest it is often a sign that you are not on their mind a great deal and perhaps have little interest in knowing you better. While some men may find it difficult to talk many will put forth an effort, even when it is not their strong suit, to let you know that they care about how you’re feeling. It can be very important in the early stages of a relationship to share details of your life with your partner as in the beginning stages people are often on their best behavior and not always completely open with their faults. If a man is looking to spend a good deal of time with you in his future, he will often want to know what kind of person you are on a day to day basis.
Chance of Long-term Relationship with open sharing: 80%
- Remembering: An almost sure sign of interest from a man is when he remembers things you have said or done that you did not expect he would. Often this means he is paying close attention to you and feels that it is important to invest his time in your relationship. Though some men have great difficulty with this quality and may not be an indication of their feelings, most men have difficulty remembering simply because they do not find it important. If a man surprises you by remembering something that you expressed some time ago often it will pertain to a gift or place that you wanted to visit. Other memories that might indicate his intentions for a lengthy relationship could be: remembering your eye color, something you wore; a food or drink that you especially enjoyed or even a song that was playing when you were together. Keeping what is important to you, close to him, shows that he most likely hopes to take your relationship to the next level.
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he remembers things you’ve said or done: 75%
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he remembers the little things you say or do: 85%
- Making Plans: A man who sees your relationship heading somewhere will have no qualms about making plans in the future; whether it is as simple as attending an event for which you must buy tickets in advance or planning an entire vacation, this often a good sign that he believes your relationship will last. Be advised that some men will discuss plans that they never intend to carry out simply to be deceptive; if an item must be purchased in advance and he hesitates this can indicate that his intentions toward you are, at least at the time, uncertain. Another aspect of planning is that for wealthier men elaborate plans can be quickly dissolved without any real inconvenience; keep this in mind if he flashes around seemingly expensive items for the future that you would normally see as a sign of commitment.
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he makes real plans with you: 80%
- Meeting Friends: If a man intends to make you apart of his life meeting his friends is an important step; not only is it important that they like you, but also that you at the very least, don’t dislike them. Though this can be a good sign of commitment in a relationship its certainty can vary with the types of friends he chooses to keep. Often you will see a slightly different side of him when he interacts with his friends and this too can help to show you whether or not he has been honest about his intentions. Don’t take it too personally if he isn’t as affectionate around his buddies; often he will receive a little verbal abuse for this later, but if he is completely distant or acts a great differently than you have seen in the past be cautious about his intentions.
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he asks you to meet his friends: 50%
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he asks you to meet friends and it goes well: 65%
- Meeting Family: Unlike meeting his friends, being invited to meet his family is often a great deal more personal and important in a relationship. Often when a man is simply playing the field he will not want you to meet his family because this allows for an attachment he is not prepared for. If you are invited to meet his family and it goes well this is a very positive sign for your future; often there is a parent or sibling he is looking for approval from and this means he is considering long-term potential.
Chance of Long-term Relationship if you meet his family: 70%
Chance of Long-term Relationship if you meet his family and it goes well 90%
- Access to Personal Space: If a man allows you to take root in his life by placing things that will remind him of you in his personal space this is often a sign that he sees a future with you. Again caution is better than assumption; however most men will find the adjustment of what has been previously, only their space, one of the most difficult transitions in their life, by doing so he is showing you that he wants to make room in his life for you and all that you are. This adjustment can apply to anything from giving you a drawer and closet space in his home to typing your name into his speed dial; however small the change it is still often a sign that he hopes your relationship will last.
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he makes a small adjustment to his space: 35%
Chance of Long-term Relationship if he makes a large adjustment to his space: 75%
Through the course of your relationship you may have many moments when you find you have completely misjudged a particular phrase or action from your partner; it is important to remember that when it doubt it is often best to error on the side of caution. Though relationships do require a certain amount of risk no one enjoys feeling taken advantage of; pay attention to his behavior and how he acts with you and above all, how you feel about yourself when you are together.