Anyone who has ever spent any time in the dating world knows about the hidden rules and agendas that are so often thrust upon singles who simply looking for romance and companionship. However much a person may not agree with some of these standards, it doesn't often pay to ignore them.
Knowing the rules and choosing not to play by them may help you to feel more confident, but in some cases the rules do make sense. The calling rule, for example is approximately known as follows:
After a date one may not call too soon, or one will be classified as desperate and needy. One must also not call too late or one will be thought of as disinterested and unromantic.
Because this rule defines how many feel about calling a person after a date, and yet doesn't really help with an exact time frame, it can be difficult to know when the appropriate time is to pick up the phone.
In an age where some individuals text more often than call, more confusion is thrown into this rule simply because many people do not consider a text message the same as a phone call. In many ways a text is more aloof, non-committal and casual, which can be convenient if you're hoping to appear just that way. However, texts can also be misunderstood, or misinterpreted, which can be extremely destructive to a new relationship.
So when exactly can you call that person who you know little about, but find extremely charming? There is no precise guide because too many people feel differently about the subject; however in many cases following a standard practice may help you to avoid making any embarrassing mistakes before you've had a chance to show your sweetheart why they should love you.
Keep in mind that no chart, dating guide or planner can take charge of your feelings. If a date went especially well for you and the other person simply follow your more romantic feelings and take a chance.
First Date:
- If the date was a morning/afternoon date that ended within just a few hours it may be appropriate to call in about one week.
- For an evening date that did not result in the two of you spending the night together a three to four day time table for calling is appropriate.
- A date which results in a person spending the night often requires a call in two days, perhaps sooner if the night went especially well.
- If after the first date you feel very lukewarm about the person, but would like to give them a second chance a time period of 1-2 weeks time is acceptable for asking out on a second chance date.
- Particularly romantic dates that led to a great deal of personal conversation and physical contact on a lengthy time table may require a next day phone call. Though the next day phone call may be risky if the date was special enough you will each be eager to speak again.
Second to Forth Date:
- For a pleasant date that is relatively casual while still including some romance you may find that three days is an excellent amount of time.
- Extremely casual relationships which have now encountered several dates may only find a weekly call necessary to keep both individuals happy.
- Highly physical, but casual relationships may find that any time table between three to seven days is acceptable.
- Those who find themselves in a relationship which is quickly becoming both physically and mentally intimate may wish to let no more than two days go by before phoning.
- Extremely close and well acquainted mental and physical couples may think that calling every day or every other day is quite appropriate.
Dating for One Month:
- For causal relationships a weekly call is excellent.
- Romantic, but semi casual relationships should be on a three to four day calling loop.
- Extremely close relationships may include more than one call every day and allow no more than two days to pass without calling.
Dating for Over One Month:
By now the pattern of your relationship should be fairly well set and unless you and your partner choose to change the nature of it your calling pattern should remain approximately the way it currently is. Though common sense will often lead you to the same conclusions as above it is important to remember that when it comes to matters of the heart, to love and lust, many people often lose themselves and wish only to hear the voice of the person they long to be with.
Don't allow too many of those unspoken, but well known rules to dictate how you should act and certainly not how you should feel. Follow your heart and in many cases you will find that whenever you want to pick up the phone and call that special someone, if they feel the same way, it is exactly the right time to do so.
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