There are basically three types of people when it comes to relationship commitment (and many subtypes, but let's try to keep it simple.) Those three consist of those looking for a committed relationship, those open to the idea, but not actively searching and those who have no desire to be in one at all.
While the answer of whether or not to commit to a relationship seems fairly easy, especially if you happen to fall on one side or another of those three groups, the reasons for doing either aren't always so simple.
Group One: Ready for Commitment
Those looking to find love are usually open to any dating help or advice they can find about how they might perfect their romantic skills because they are very willing to put the effort into being the best kind of partner they can be.
Many relationship seekers are finding that meeting singles through internet dating allows them the unique opportunity to find others who they truly share interests, life goals and other important issues with before even taking the time to chat. This method of dating has given new hope to the relationship minded singles, tired of trying to find places where people meet who they might have something in common with. It is important to note the success of such a method as it is a clear indication of just how many people around the world are eager to find real love.
Finding a person to share your life with whom you can trust, depend on and adore may come at the expense of less freedom, hard work and some fairly ridiculous squabbles; but most happily committed relationship minded people wouldn't have it any other way.
Feeling ready to be in a solid relationship with a trusted partner is often a wonderful sign of maturity and an eagerness to share and enjoy life with someone special. While this is a wonderful attitude to have if you hope to be in a relationship, for some it may also be a red flag.
Starting a new relationship for one who is too eager to get to a comfort stage may cause them to miss out on some of the initial excitement a person can find within the dating community. This may have negative side effects later on when a person feels that they've missed out on certain experiences.
Another problem to watch for might be when an individual is so eager to secure a romantic relationship that they settle for a person who does no truly deserve them. This kind of desperation may cause them to become dependent on another person for love, validation and approval perhaps even leading them to make drastic, unnecessary changes just to please that person.
In order to be able be able to make such an important decision it is vital that you truly know how you feel about the person you are considering committing to. If the feelings you have are more about just being in a relationship, it may be time to reevaluate.
Group Two: Romantic Future Uncertain
Singles who feel open to the idea of being in a committed relationship, if the right person should come along, often have a healthy attitude towards the idea in general.
The ability to meet new people and take the relationship one step at a time, without setting up a prior agenda is a wonderful way to take each person as they come and allows for many different possibilities and adventures along the way.
While this balance works for many people, there are some who may find they miss out on their chance of happiness in a relationship simply because they didn't know to go after what they wanted. TH opportunities to find real love don't come often and when they do it is an important thing to be able to recognize them.
Another problem with being uncertain about what you're ready for and what you're not is that if the situation does call for you to make a decision, hesitation may be taken a sign that you simply aren't ready, or possibly in love with the person asking for an answer.
While most of the people who feel undecided will not experience too much difficulty recognizing the real thing should it come along, it worth noting that without some idea of what you'd like ideally it may be hard to find it.
Group Three: No Desire to Commit
Knowing that you don't have any desire to share your life with a romantic partner is more honorable a decision than some might think. The key is to let others know that any relationship shared will be casual at best, thus avoiding any hurt feelings or embarrassment later on.
Singles in this group are often more eager for adventure out of life and see a committed relationship as an obstacle, possibly barring them from certain life goals that do not mix well with a long-term romantic relationship.
Just as with those eager to find a relationship, online dating provides a host of sites dedicated to those who seek only to have a good time with no string, proving that the population of non-committers is a large one.
As with the other two groups, most of the people in this one are probably in a good place and happy about their reluctance to be tied down; there are however some red flags about this behavior that are worth mentioning.
For some the extent of the romantic abilities is simply to find a date, any date that will help them to have fun for a while and that they can sever ties with should anything become too serious. This unfortunately can be a sign of trouble, not just in romance but in any area of life that requires responsibility.
Another underlying problem to watch for might be in those that refuse to commit, but secretly want to and can't. This is a legitimate phobia that can be caused by all sorts of other problems and too often goes unsolved until a person no longer even hopes to find a serious relationship.
All Groups:
Whatever your stance on relationships it's important to know how you feel and to be able to express these feelings about and to anyone you might share your life with. Whether your decision is steer clear or to find true love in the end it's your happiness that is at stake and to allow it to slip away for the wrong reasons is a commitment only to regret and sadness.
Great Date Guide Volume I ~ Meeting and Greeting
Great Date Guide Volume II ~ Getting to Know You
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