Knowing when it’s the right time to let your hormones run wild or the right time to take it slow isn’t the only issue when it comes to considering physical intimacy. Another problem that goes hand in hand with making this decision is perception, or the types of signals you may be sending out by taking a certain action.
To begin with, it’s important to understand the difference between casual and relationship dating advice. The nature of the relationship and your hopes for what may happen in the future may have an enormous impact on the decisions you make about becoming physically intimate, so it’s good to know where you’re headed in your romantic relationship.
Casual:
For those looking to keep things simple there are few rules about how soon you proceed to the physical stage of a relationship. To put it simply, you are allowed to follow your instincts without too much forethought simply because it is unlikely that you intend to invest much of your time.
Most people who want to keep things casual don’t often need to worry about what kind of message they might be putting out by rushing or delaying the physical aspects because they have not emotionally invested themselves in the other person.
In many ways a truly casual relationship is more like a series of experiences that are the equivalent of a good first date. Many people enjoy keeping things fresh and new with all of the excitement that comes from first getting to know another person and because of this the best date advice is often just to follow your instincts.
However casual you hope to keep a relationship it is always vital that you remember to be safe about how you date. Those who like to live a little wildly need to keep in mind the very real risks that come with becoming intimate with strangers.
Another problem to watch out for when trying to keep things casual is the risk of becoming attached. When in a relationship with no expectations it can be difficult not to find yourself becoming emotionally involved without making the decision to do so. If such an event occurs you may not be able to depend upon the other person feeling the same way, but you may learn that you have reached a stage where you need to begin looking for something more meaningful.
Committed Relationships:
Starting a new relationship with a long-term goal in mind can be a bit scary, especially if you quickly find yourself attracted to the person. Those who experience something that feels like the perfect date may be tempted to get physically close immediately, being swept up in the moment.
For this reason it is usually a good idea to make a decision about how far you’re willing to take the physical side prior to going out. Not that being swept up in a passionate moment isn’t nice, but you need to be able to be happy about your actions the next day too and for many this is not the case.
There are special couples who really may actually find love the very first time they meet, but it a rare thing and should not be treated frivolously if you hope to form real bonds. Setting some limits for yourself before you can get carried away by your hormones may help you on many levels of your relationship, which in the end may allow you to have successes that were unreachable before:
- Building Passion: Taking the physical process slowly often creates a feeling of mystery, longing and desire in new couples. By savoring your passion you may have a chance to ease into something far more amazing that a casual fling.
- Improving Experience: Connecting through emotional intimacy as well as physical can make physical experience a great deal more satisfying, for both women and men. By giving yourselves time to let your emotional connections strengthen you increase the chances of the physical experience with your lover feeling more complete and beyond comparison.
- Longevity: Building up to a physical relationship rather than plunging in too soon may also allow you to have a better relationship in the long run. By extending the “honeymoon” stage you may enjoy a far more expansive phase of physical enjoyment with your partner that is built upon a foundation of emotional closeness. This may help provide a better recipe for keeping your sex life close and exciting far longer than the run of a normal casual affair.
Now only you can know for sure if you feel it is the right time for you to become physically intimate with another person. In the end you need to trust your own mind, morals and judgment so that whatever your decision is, you feel comfortable with it.
Try to keep in mind that if you are seriously conflicted, this may indicate you are not yet ready to enter the next phase and having to sacrifice one decision to appease another shouldn’t be necessary if the relationship and the choices are right for you.
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